This week on Wellness Weekly, we’re diving into a topic that touches every one of us at some point in our lives: grief. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a major life change, or even the end of a dream, grief shows up in many forms and impacts us in unique ways.

We’ll explore what grief is, why it’s not a linear process, and how to take care of your mental health while navigating its complexities. We’ll also discuss how to support loved ones through their grief and why there’s no “right” way to grieve. Stay tuned as we unpack this important and deeply personal subject together.

Grief isn’t something you simply "get over" or "move past." It’s not a single moment in time or a box you check on a to-do list. Instead, grief is a dynamic and often unpredictable process that ebbs and flows. It can be triggered by specific events or emerge unexpectedly, even long after the initial loss. This fluidity is part of what makes grief such a deeply personal and challenging experience.

Renowned grief expert Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. While these stages provide a framework to understand some of the emotions commonly experienced during grief, they were never intended to prescribe how grief should unfold. These stages are not linear, nor are they universal. Some individuals may revisit certain stages multiple times, while others might skip stages entirely. For example, one person might spend weeks in a state of denial, struggling to acknowledge the loss, while another might move directly into acceptance but experience waves of anger or depression months later.

It’s also important to recognize that grief doesn’t follow a strict timeline. Societal expectations or external pressures often suggest that grief should have an endpoint—a point where you "return to normal." However, grief is not something to be rushed or resolved. The journey through grief is as unique as the individual experiencing it. For some, it may take years to fully process the loss, while others may find a sense of peace sooner. Understanding this can alleviate the pressure to grieve a certain way or within a specific timeframe.

The nature of grief also varies depending on the type of loss. The death of a loved one might bring about different emotions compared to the loss of a relationship, a job, or even a version of yourself you once knew. Grieving the intangible, such as a missed opportunity or an unfulfilled dream, is no less valid than mourning a tangible loss. Each type of grief is unique, but all require time, self-compassion, and a willingness to embrace the process.

Ultimately, grief is a journey, not a destination. There’s no singular path or endpoint, and that’s okay. It’s about learning to carry the weight of your loss while gradually discovering moments of lightness and joy amidst the sorrow. Through understanding, patience, and support, the journey of grief can also become one of healing and growth.

One of the most important truths about grief is that there is no "correct" way to experience it. Society often imposes expectations on how grief should look, such as crying openly, withdrawing from daily life, or returning to "normal" within a set time. These expectations can create unnecessary guilt or shame for those who grieve differently. The reality is that grief is as unique as the person experiencing it, shaped by personality, culture, past experiences, and the specific relationship to the loss.

Some people express their emotions outwardly, shedding tears and speaking openly about their pain. Others may prefer solitude, finding comfort in reflection rather than verbal expression. Some immerse themselves in work or hobbies as a distraction, while others might channel their grief into creativity, activism, or rituals of remembrance. None of these approaches are wrong. They are simply different ways to process the unthinkable reality of loss.

When I (Taylor, the founder of Living Revive) lost both of my grandparents, I didn’t cry as much as other people thought I should. It wasn’t because I wasn’t sad or deeply affected by their passing—quite the opposite. I loved them dearly, and their loss left a profound void in my life. But instead of tears, I found myself in a state of shock, emotionally frozen as I tried to process what had happened.

This reaction wasn’t what people around me expected, and it led to whispers and judgment. I was viewed as strange, even distant, because I wasn’t reacting the way others thought I should. “Why isn’t she crying?” some people asked. Others wondered aloud if I cared at all. But what they didn’t understand was that my grief didn’t fit their script. My silence wasn’t apathy; it was the result of being overwhelmed. I didn’t have the emotional bandwidth to cry in the moment, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t grieving deeply.

Experiences like mine highlight the dangers of societal assumptions about grief. These judgments can compound an already painful experience, adding feelings of alienation or inadequacy. When you’re in the depths of grief, the last thing you need is to worry about meeting someone else’s expectations of how you should feel or behave.

Grieving in your own way is not just okay—it’s necessary. Honoring your process, however it looks, allows you to move through grief authentically. If you don’t cry, that’s okay. If you cry every day for months, that’s okay too. If you need to talk about your loss repeatedly, or if you prefer to hold those memories close, both are valid.

Grief is a deeply personal experience, and the idea that there is a “normal” way to grieve is both harmful and untrue. By rejecting societal expectations and allowing yourself the freedom to grieve naturally, you can focus on what truly matters: navigating your emotions in a way that fosters healing and growth.

The next time you find yourself—or someone else—grieving, remember: there is no right or wrong way to mourn. There’s only your way, and that is enough.

Supporting a grieving friend can be one of the most meaningful things you do, but it can also feel intimidating. You might wonder what to say, what to do, or how to avoid doing the “wrong” thing. The truth is, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all way to support someone through loss because grief looks different for everyone. The best way to care for someone is to show up for them—authentically, consistently, and with compassion. Just as no two people grieve the same way, there is no single method for supporting someone who has lost a loved one. Some people need company and conversation, while others may prefer quiet moments of solitude. Some might want to talk about their loss extensively, while others may not feel ready to speak about it at all.

A common misconception is that giving someone space is always the best idea. While it’s true that some individuals may appreciate time alone to process their feelings, this shouldn’t be assumed. Too often, "giving space" becomes a way of avoiding discomfort or not knowing what to say. Many grieving people feel isolated because friends and loved ones pull away, worried about saying the wrong thing or believing that distance is what the grieving person needs.

Instead of making assumptions, ask directly: “How can I best support you right now?” This question can open the door for the person to communicate their needs. They might not have a clear answer, and that’s okay too. Grief is messy, and sometimes they won’t know what they need until they feel it.

Showing up for someone who is grieving doesn’t have to involve grand gestures; it’s about being present, attentive, and reliable. Being physically present can provide immense comfort, whether that means sitting quietly with them, bringing over a meal, or simply sharing the same space. Even if you’re unsure of what to say, your willingness to be there speaks volumes. Offering practical help is another meaningful way to show support. Grief often makes handling everyday tasks feel overwhelming, so taking on errands, childcare, or even walking their dog can be a huge relief. Avoid vague offers like, “Let me know if you need anything.” Instead, be specific: “Can I bring dinner on Tuesday?” or “I’d like to take care of the groceries this week.”

It’s equally important to validate their feelings without trying to fix them. Avoid platitudes like, “They’re in a better place,” and opt for empathetic acknowledgments like, “I can’t imagine how hard this is for you.” This kind of validation reassures them that their emotions are normal and that it’s okay to grieve in their own way. Another crucial aspect of support is continuing to check in long after the initial loss. Many people show up immediately after a death but fade away once the funeral is over and life seems to move on. For the grieving person, however, this is often when the weight of their loss truly sets in. Keep reaching out with a simple text, like, “Thinking of you today,” or a phone call to say, “I’m here if you want to talk.” These small gestures can make a world of difference.

Finally, follow their lead. Pay attention to how they respond to your gestures. If they seem to want company, make yourself available. If they appear to need time alone, respect that—but don’t disappear entirely. Grief is an evolving process, and their needs may shift over time. By showing up consistently and authentically, you offer the kind of support that truly matters: a steady presence that honors their unique journey through loss.

While your intentions may be good, certain actions can unintentionally cause harm when supporting someone who is grieving. One common mistake is rushing their healing by saying things like, “It’s time to move on” or “You need to be strong.” Grief doesn’t follow a set timeline, and urging someone to “get over it” can invalidate their feelings and create additional pressure. Another misstep is disappearing because you feel uncomfortable or unsure of what to say. Pulling away only reinforces their sense of isolation, making an already difficult time even harder. Lastly, avoid comparing losses by saying, “I know exactly how you feel.” While meant to empathize, this statement can feel dismissive, as every grief journey is unique and deeply personal. Instead, focus on being a steady, compassionate presence that respects their individual process.

Grief is often misunderstood as something you eventually "get over" or "move past," but this perspective minimizes the depth and permanence of loss. Moving forward after a significant loss doesn’t mean forgetting your loved one or leaving them behind. Instead, it’s about learning to carry their memory with you in a way that enriches your life, even as you continue to experience moments of sadness or longing.

One way to move forward is by creating rituals to honor your loved one. These rituals don’t have to be grand; they can be as simple as lighting a candle on significant dates, visiting a favorite place that reminds you of them, or preparing a meal they loved. These acts of remembrance can provide comfort and keep their memory alive in your everyday life. Sharing stories about your loved one is another powerful way to keep their presence close. Whether it’s with family, friends, or in a journal, reflecting on the joyful, funny, or meaningful moments you shared can be both healing and grounding.

Finding ways to channel their legacy into positive action can also be a source of solace. This might mean supporting a cause they cared about, pursuing a dream they encouraged you to follow, or embodying qualities they admired. Turning your grief into a force for good not only honors their memory but can also give you a renewed sense of purpose and connection.

It’s important to recognize that healing is not about erasing pain but about finding a way to coexist with it while embracing life’s beauty and opportunities. Grief may always be a part of you, but it doesn’t have to define you. Over time, the sharp edges of your pain may soften, making space for new joys, relationships, and experiences. Moving forward doesn’t mean you love or miss your loved one any less; it means you’ve found a way to integrate their memory into the fabric of your life.

Ultimately, moving forward without moving on is an act of resilience and love. It’s about honoring the past while remaining open to the possibilities of the present and future. By carrying their memory with you, you ensure that their impact continues to shape and inspire you in meaningful ways.

Grief is a natural response to loss, and for many, it follows a path of gradually adjusting to life without the loved one while carrying their memory forward. However, sometimes grief can become overwhelming or take a complicated turn, making it difficult to function or find a sense of stability. This is where seeking professional help becomes not only helpful but essential.

One indication that professional help may be needed is when grief persists for an extended period without signs of easing, often referred to as complicated grief or prolonged grief disorder (PGD). In these cases, individuals may feel stuck in their sorrow, unable to adapt to life after the loss. Symptoms might include intense yearning or longing for the deceased, preoccupation with the circumstances of the loss, or an inability to accept the reality of their passing.

Additionally, if grief starts interfering significantly with daily functioning—such as work, relationships, or self-care—it’s a signal to reach out for support. Other warning signs include experiencing symptoms of intense guilt or self-blame beyond what is typical, feeling hopeless or numb to life, or having recurring thoughts of self-harm or wishing to join the deceased. These feelings, while a part of some grief experiences, require the intervention of a mental health professional when they become persistent or severe.

Therapists who specialize in grief and loss provide a safe, nonjudgmental space for individuals to process their emotions. They can help normalize the complexities of grief, reduce feelings of isolation, and teach effective coping strategies. Therapy may involve talk sessions to explore unresolved emotions, cognitive-behavioral techniques to address negative thought patterns, or even creative approaches like art or narrative therapy to help express feelings that are hard to put into words.

For some, grief may trigger or exacerbate underlying mental health conditions like anxiety or depression. In these cases, a therapist can work alongside a psychiatrist to explore treatment options, including medication if necessary. Addressing these conditions early can prevent further emotional distress and help individuals regain a sense of balance.

Seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness or an inability to cope—it’s an act of self-care and courage. Grief is a profound experience, and there’s no shame in needing additional support to navigate it. Whether through individual therapy, group counseling, or support groups for bereaved individuals, professional guidance can be a transformative step toward healing.

Remember, you don’t have to wait until grief feels unbearable to seek help. Therapy can also be a proactive resource for those who simply want guidance through the challenges of loss. Reaching out to a professional is a powerful way to honor your mental health and begin the journey of healing with compassionate support.

While grief can feel isolating, you don’t have to walk the path alone. These resources—whether through books, online support, therapy, or support groups—offer a variety of ways to help you through the emotional challenges of loss. Healing is a deeply personal journey, and it's important to seek out the tools and support systems that work best for you.